The plan sounds good when you make it at lunchtime. By the end of work, you are hungry, tired and facing another journey before the social part even begins.
Choose an arrangement that accounts for the transition. A nearby early meal, a short meeting or a clearly bounded activity may work better than a plan that requires several hours of energy after a demanding day.
Tell the other person what is realistic. “I would like to see you, but a quiet meal and an early finish would suit me” is more useful than agreeing to a large evening and hoping they notice you fading.
Consider practical needs before arrival. Leave enough time for food, travel and any change of clothes or access arrangements. A plan built around rushing from one obligation to another can make even welcome company feel difficult.
Keep the invitation flexible without making it unreliable. If your work schedule is genuinely unpredictable, explain that when arranging the meeting and agree on when you will confirm. Do not ask someone else to hold an entire evening indefinitely while you decide whether you are available.
Once you meet, allow the visit to be small. You do not need to add another stop because the first part went well. Ending comfortably can preserve the pleasure of the meeting and make it easier to arrange again.
Choose the meeting point with the whole journey in mind. Somewhere midway on a map may still require an awkward change of transport for one person. Discuss the actual route, the likely arrival time and how late each of you wants to stay. A simple plan near a useful connection can be more generous than an impressive destination that turns a short evening into a long trip.
Allow the plan to have a smaller version when the day has been demanding. Dinner might become a quick bite, or a long outing a short catch-up. Agree on that flexibility together rather than making one person guess whether an early departure means disappointment. If the schedule repeatedly leaves you too depleted to enjoy meeting, consider another day or format. Friendship deserves an arrangement in which you can be present, not merely physically accounted for.
If weekday evenings repeatedly do not work, try another format rather than blaming your enthusiasm for friendship. A weekend breakfast, a lunch meeting or a call may fit better. The relationship needs a usable opening in both lives, not a particular conventional time slot. A realistic social plan can be more generous than an ambitious one whose main requirement is that everyone ignore how the day has actually felt.
A little more room to be yourself.